i came home today and found my cockatiel Adlai dead in her cage today. she was spread out over her water bowl and stiff, so i guess she had been there like that for a couple of hours and no one had noticed. i started crying, and i’ve been crying for a while. my mom and brother took her and the cage to the trash because i couldn’t look at her without freaking out. it was horrible and awful and terrible and so sad, and i didn’t know anything was wrong. my mom said she had been really quiet for the past few days and thought something was wrong, i thought she was only quiet because she had been sitting on her eggs and wanted to be alone. she couldn’t get out of the cage, i don’t know why, i had left the door open in case she wanted to come out, but she didn’t make it. i can only think that maybe she became egg-bound and it killed her, or she had a night fright and had a heart attack. i feel so guilty because she was in there all alone with no help and i don’t know if she suffered or not. i should have been there to help her, maybe i could have done something. maybe the small cage stressed her out, i should have put up her new cage sooner. i only wanted her to be happy because her life had been kind of tough.

i don’t know how old she was, but she wasn’t ancient, i don’t think it was her time. i feel so horrible that she died alone. she had been acting weird last week, but i didn’t think anything of it. i should have taken her to a vet or done something to help her. i know she’s happier where she is now, and i’m glad for that, but i still feel i should have done more. now i have this cage for no bird. i want another one, but at the same time i think i’ll be heartbroken for a while and shouldn’t try to replace her with another bird. i always wanted a pet bird, and even though she wasn’t your average cockatiel, she was still a really great pet who made me laugh and who i loved very much. i’m sorry i didn’t do better by her. the next time i have a bird it’ll be different. 

rest in peace little birdy. 

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